Two blondes are having lunch when one whispers,
“I’m getting a b**b job.”
The other blonde replies,
“That’s nothing, I’m getting my a**hole bleached!”
The first blonde gasps and says,
“Oh wow! I didn’t know your boyfriend was getting highlights too!”
Loved this ? Here are 40 more jokes with blondes just for you:
Joke 1: Extra Decaf Dilemma
A blonde walks into a bustling coffee shop and cheerfully asks the barista, “Do you have any decaf?” When the barista confirms the availability, she then asks with a quirky smile, “Could you also mix in some extra decaf?” The barista, caught off‑guard by the unusual request, explains that the shop serves only one standard decaf option. The blonde beams and replies, “That’s perfect—I need something extra to keep me awake while I figure this out!” Her light‑hearted approach to the seemingly contradictory request tickles the customers around her, setting the tone for a day where humor reigns supreme.
Joke 2: Test Drive Troubles
At a shiny car dealership, a blonde eagerly inspects a sports car, marveling at its sleek design. The salesman, sensing her enthusiasm, invites her for a test drive by asking if she would like to take the car for a spin. With a humorous twist, she replies, “I’d love to test drive it, but I have one condition—if I accidentally drive it off the lot, could you please send a tow truck to rescue me?” The salesman chuckles at the unexpected request, assuring her that they’ll take good care if that ever happens. Delighted with the response, she adds, “Excellent—safety first, even if I can’t figure out how to start it!”
Joke 3: Remote Control Riddles
During a shopping trip for a new television, one blonde asks her friend if the TV comes with a remote control. The friend pauses and casually suggests, “If it doesn’t, we can always use our cell phones.” After purchasing the TV and setting it up at home, they quickly discover that the screen displays a feature called “voice control” instead of the physical remote. One exclaims in disbelief, “It says ‘voice control’—we have to shout commands!” Her friend shakes her head and adds, “Next time, let’s just get a regular TV that lets us press buttons!”
Joke 4: Culinary Confusion
A blonde, eager to impress her friends, decides to bake a cake from scratch. She follows the recipe meticulously—except for one puzzling step: when the instructions say “preheat the oven,” she mistakenly assumes it means to start reading the food labels on the boxes of ingredients. When her friends finally arrive, they find the kitchen cluttered with boxes instead of the delicious aroma of baking cake. One friend asks, “Where’s the cake?” The blonde grins sheepishly and replies, “I was busy trying to figure out which box said ‘preheated!’ Guess the cake will have to wait until after we decode the labels!”
Joke 5: Electrons on the Highway
At a science museum, one blonde pauses at an interactive exhibit dedicated to electricity. As the guide explains that electrons flow like little rivers creating an electrical current, she interjects with wonder, “So, do electrons have their own highway?” The guide, amused by her imaginative question, confirms, “In a manner of speaking, yes.” The blonde’s eyes light up as she responds, “Fantastic—I never knew I needed to learn how electrons drive before I started driving my own car!”
Joke 6: Keyboard Conundrum
A blonde calls customer support for her new computer, exclaiming, “I think something’s wrong with my keyboard!” The technician inquires about the issue, and she explains that when she types the word “hello,” the letters are jumbled to “ohlel.” The technician suggests, “Maybe you pressed your hands too quickly on the keyboard.” Laughing at the absurdity of the situation, the blonde replies, “That must be it—I was typing so fast, I wanted to send greetings in a flash because I love my computer!”
Joke 7: Bubbly Expectations
Dining at a fancy restaurant, a blonde examines the drink menu as the waiter politely asks, “Would you like still or sparkling water?” With a thoughtful frown, she wonders aloud, “I think I’d like sparkling—does it come with bubbles of excitement?” The waiter, charmed by her clever twist, confirms, “Yes, our sparkling water is our most exciting option!” Her smile widens as she declares, “Great—life’s too short for flat experiences, so bring on the extra sparkle!”
Joke 8: The Magic Parrot
A blonde visits a pet store and is captivated when the owner claims that a particular parrot can speak three languages—English, Spanish, and French. Amazed, she asks, “Wow, which languages does it speak?” The owner replies cheerfully, “That’s right—this parrot can chat in three languages!” The blonde thinks for a moment and adds, “I’d love to have a parrot that sends voice messages like my phone—if only it could speak like my messaging app! French might not even come in handy when I’m ordering pizza!”
Joke 9: Puzzle Book Ponderings
At a quiet bookstore, a blonde approaches the counter and inquires if there’s a book on how to solve puzzles. The helpful clerk directs her to the self-help section, but she hesitates, puzzled by the location. “Shouldn’t a book on puzzles be in the mystery section?” she muses. The clerk chuckles and replies, “Well, that’s the puzzle of it!” Grinning, she decides, “I’ll take one—maybe it will finally help me decipher where all these books are hidden!”
Joke 10: Pond of Surprises
On a sunny hiking day, a blonde spots a serene pond and excitedly exclaims, “I’m going to jump in and cool off!” Before she can make her leap, a nearby hiker asks, “Do you know how deep it is?” The blonde shrugs and says, “Not really, but I can see the bottom from here!” After taking a hearty plunge, she emerges laughing, “I told you—it’s like a window into another world!”
Joke 11: Driving Test Philosophy
During a driving test, a blonde is asked by the examiner, “What do you do when you see a yield sign?” With a beaming smile, she replies, “I yield to my passengers—safety first, after all!” Though the examiner is taken aback by her unconventional answer, he eventually chuckles and notes, “Well, it’s certainly a creative way to ensure everyone feels safe!” Confidently, she adds, “I always believe in giving everyone a fair turn, both on the road and in life!”
Joke 12: Heart-Shaped Burgers
At a bustling fast-food restaurant, a blonde inquires at the counter, “Do you sell any sandwiches made with love?” The cashier replies, “We make our sandwiches with quality ingredients, but nothing particularly special.” Undeterred, the blonde declares, “I’m looking for heart‑shaped burgers! If every burger got a little love and hugs, then my day would be made!” With a smile, the cashier responds, “While we can’t create heart shapes, your enthusiasm is contagious!”
Joke 13: Library Mysteries
In a quiet bookstore, a blonde asks the librarian, “Do you have a book on how to solve puzzles?” After a brief moment of thought, she remarks, “If it’s about puzzles, shouldn’t it be in the mystery section?” The librarian smiles and says, “That’s the real mystery, isn’t it?” The blonde laughs, “I’ll take one, and maybe along the way, I’ll unravel the mystery of where all the self-help books are hidden!”
Joke 14: Yoga Class Worries
During a soothing yoga class, a blonde is asked to close her eyes and relax. In a hushed whisper, she wonders aloud, “If I open my eyes during relaxation, will I accidentally become too relaxed?” The instructor, chuckling softly, advises, “Just trust the process.” The blonde ponders, “I’m just worried I might be so zen that I forget how to find my slippers afterward!” Her playful concern brings warm laughter to the entire class.
Joke 15: Nutty Adventure
At a festive party, a blonde spots a bowl of mixed nuts and muses, “Am I looking at walnuts, or are these just really fancy peanuts?” A friend leans in and replies, “They’re a mix—life is full of surprises!” With a cheerful nod, she declares, “Perfect! Every bite is a crunchy adventure—nuts, surprises, and all!”
Joke 16: Typing Troubles
A blonde is on the phone with customer support for her new computer, complaining about a keyboard mishap. “Whenever I type, the letters come out in a weird order—I typed ‘hello’ and it came out as ‘ohlel’!” The technician suggests, “Maybe you’re pressing the keys too quickly.” Laughing at the thought, she replies, “That’s it—I must be sending greetings at lightning speed because I just can’t get enough of my computer!”
Joke 17: Discount Dilemma at the Mall
At a busy shopping mall, a blonde notices a button labeled “Press for Discount.” Intrigued, she presses it repeatedly, only to find no visible change. Perplexed, she calls over a store clerk and asks, “Why isn’t my discount showing?” The clerk explains with a smile, “That button is just for fun!” Undeterred, the blonde shrugs, “I guess I’ll have to rely on my own shopping skills—no magical discounts today!”
Joke 18: Picnic Geometry
During a sunny picnic, a blonde struggles to unfold her checkered blanket. She debates aloud, “Should I fold it like a letter or roll it up like a scroll?” A nearby picnicker pipes in with a laugh, “Maybe you should ask the blanket for directions!” The blonde bursts into laughter, admitting, “Clearly, I’m lost in the art of picnic geometry!”
Joke 19: Titanic Trivia Blunder
In a spirited game of trivia, a blonde is asked, “In what year did the Titanic sink?” After pausing for dramatic effect, she confidently replies, “I’m pretty sure it was 1910, right?” The host gently corrects her, “Actually, it sank in 1912.” With a shrug and a smile, she remarks, “Well, it seems my memory has its own iceberg!”
Joke 20: Virtual Space Adventures
At a tech store, a blonde is captivated by a new virtual reality headset. When the salesperson explains its functions, she excitedly asks, “If I wear this, could I virtually visit outer space?” The salesperson nods, “In a sense, yes.” Her eyes widen as she declares, “Fantastic! I always dreamed of taking a space vacation—even if it’s just in virtual reality. Just don’t ask me to order intergalactic pizza!”
Joke 21: The Dentist’s Dilemma
While waiting in the dentist’s office, a blonde hears the dentist announce he has good and bad news. Eagerly, she asks for the good news, and the dentist replies, “You have a beautiful smile!” Curious, she then asks, “And what’s the bad news?” The dentist replies, “The drill is about to go off!” The blonde chuckles nervously and exclaims, “At least my smile remains sparkling!”
Joke 22: Navigational Queries
At a quiet library, a blonde approaches the counter and asks, “Do you have a book on self‑improvement?” The librarian points her toward a section of travel guides, explaining their utility. The blonde, slightly confused, remarks, “If it’s about self‑improvement, maybe these guides will help me find my way out of this library maze!” Her playful observation draws a smile from both the librarian and fellow patrons.
Joke 23: Soufflé Secrets
During a bustling cooking class, a blonde is asked by the chef, “What’s the secret to a perfect soufflé?” With a mischievous grin, she replies, “I think you need some serious fluff!” The chef nods in amusement, and she continues, “I even tried teaching my hair to rise like a soufflé this morning!” The room fills with laughter as the class appreciates her creative twist on culinary excellence.
Joke 24: Toaster Troubles
In the middle of a hectic morning, a blonde exclaims, “My toaster isn’t working!” When customer support inquires about the problem, she confesses, “I unplugged it to remove the crumbs and completely forgot to plug it back in.” Her friend chuckles, “So your toaster’s on permanent vacation?” The blonde grins, “Seems like it’s taking an extended break—maybe it’ll come back with better toast!”
Joke 25: Roller Coaster Revelations
At an amusement park, a blonde eagerly waits in line for a roller coaster. As the ride begins, she shouts, “I hope it goes as fast as my thoughts!” Mid‑ride, she glances around in amazement and laughs, “I’m not sure if the coaster is speeding or if my brain has taken a vacation!” Her friends join in the laughter, celebrating the blend of thrill and humor in her exuberant outlook.
Joke 26: Language Class Antics
A blonde signs up for a French language class to impress her friends. On the first day, when asked to introduce herself in French, she confidently states, “Bonjour—I’m Blondey McBright!” The class erupts in laughter, and the teacher gently corrects her pronunciation. The blonde, undeterred, adds, “Tomorrow, I’ll be fluent enough to order a croissant without mixing up my words!”
Joke 27: Charades Gone Wild
During a lively game of charades, a blonde is given the task of acting out a famous movie. Dramatically, she mimics sinking slowly into a chair, prompting her teammates to shout, “Is it Titanic?” With a cheeky smile, she replies, “I just wanted to see if I could sink like a ship!” Her teammates laugh and applaud, celebrating the fun unpredictability of the game.
Joke 28: Boutique Button Blunders
While shopping at a trendy boutique, a blonde is drawn to a flashy display. “Would you like to try these shoes on?” the sales associate asks. The blonde, admiring the design, quips, “I can’t tell if these shoes are truly beautiful or if I’m just experiencing a case of glittery shoe envy!” The associate grins, “They’re definitely a hit this season!” She replies with playful determination, “I’m starting a revolution one sparkling step at a time!”
Joke 29: Karaoke Confessions
At a bustling karaoke night, a blonde steps onto the stage with confidence and declares, “I’m going to sing my favorite song!” Mid‑performance, she pauses and playfully warns, “I hope the microphone doesn’t think I’m too loud!” The audience cheers her on, and after finishing her energetic rendition, a friend remarks, “You really know how to make every note shine!” She grins, “I believe if you’re going to sing, you might as well sparkle!”
Joke 30: Parrot Magic
A blonde visits a pet store looking for a magic parrot. The owner proudly presents a parrot known for speaking three languages. In amazement, the blonde says, “I’d love to have a parrot that can say ‘Abracadabra’ on command—and maybe even record a voicemail like my phone!” The owner laughs, “Well, this parrot can certainly entertain!” She leaves in high spirits, imagining a pet that combines magic with modern technology.
Joke 31: The Trivia Tumble
At a friendly trivia night, a blonde is asked, “What year did the Titanic sink?” After a thoughtful pause, she confidently answers, “1910!” The host gently corrects her, “Actually, it sank in 1912.” With a playful shrug, she quips, “I guess even my memory gets lost among the icebergs!” Laughter fills the room as everyone admires her good‑natured humor in the face of a simple miscalculation.
Joke 32: The Treadmill Conundrum
At a local gym, a blonde explores the treadmill and inquires, “What does this button do?” The trainer explains that it’s designed to set the machine’s pace. With a mischievous grin, she asks, “What if there was a button that said ‘I’m too fabulous’?” Her playful imagination sparks a round of laughter, and the trainer jokes, “We don’t have that—but your charm is already off the charts!”
Joke 33: Photography and Selfies
In a photography class, a blonde listens as the instructor explains how proper exposure can make or break a photograph. She raises an eyebrow and asks, “Does that mean my selfies will be doomed if I don’t get enough exposure?” The class laughs, and the instructor clarifies, “Not exactly—just more natural light and less flash!” The blonde smiles, “Then my camera and I have plenty of work ahead of us to truly capture our brilliance!”
Joke 34: Edible Art in the Kitchen
A blonde ventures into baking and ends up with a tray full of oddly shaped cookies. Observing the outcome, she remarks, “I thought these were supposed to be heart‑shaped, but I guess mine are more like abstract art!” Her friends laugh and commend her creativity, and she adds, “Each cookie is a one‑of‑a‑kind masterpiece—edible art that’s as delightful as it is mysterious!”
Joke 35: Rolling with the Beat
At a music festival, a blonde makes her way to a DJ booth. Curiously, she presses the button to “drop the beat” and exclaims, “Wow—I didn’t know I could drop a beat just by pressing a button!” The DJ grins and suggests, “Maybe you should become a DJ!” The blonde, ever playful, replies, “That would be amazing—I’d bring my own sparkle to every party!”
Joke 36: Charades and Icebergs
During a game of charades, a blonde is tasked with acting out a famous disaster. Taking dramatic cues, she pretends to sink slowly into a chair. When her team shouts, “Titanic?” she replies with a laugh, “I’m just trying to see if I can sink like a ship!” Her humorous performance unites the team in laughter, proving that even a simple game can spark creativity and joy.
Joke 37: The Discount Button Mystery
At a bustling mall, a blonde enthusiastically discovers a button labeled “Press for Discount.” After repeatedly pressing it and receiving no response, she calls a nearby clerk and asks, “Why isn’t my discount showing?” The clerk explains, “That button’s just for fun—it’s not operational.” The blonde shrugs and declares, “I guess I’ll have to earn my discounts the old-fashioned way—by shopping hard!”
Joke 38: Navigating the Geometry of Picnics
During a relaxed picnic in the park, a blonde finds herself struggling with a checkered blanket. “Should I fold this like a letter or roll it up like a scroll?” she muses aloud. A nearby picnic-goer quips, “Maybe you should ask the blanket for directions!” The blonde bursts into laughter, admitting, “Clearly, I’m a bit lost in the geometry of picnics today!”
Joke 39: Titanic Memory Mishap
During a spirited trivia contest, a blonde is asked, “What year did the Titanic sink?” After a moment of pondering, she confidently answers, “1910!” When corrected by the host who notes the disaster occurred in 1912, the blonde gently shrugs, “I guess my memory’s as slippery as an iceberg!” The humorous self‑deprecation leaves the audience laughing and applauding her candid mistake.
Joke 40: The Mystery of the Dripping Sink
At a hardware store, a blonde approaches the counter in search of a tool kit. “I need something that will help me solve the mysteries of household repairs,” she says. The clerk hands her a basic tool kit and adds, “This should cover most small repairs.” The blonde smiles, “Great—now I can finally tackle the enigma of why my sink drips like it’s whispering secrets!” Her playful remark turns a routine purchase into an adventure in household mystery-solving.
III. Final Reflections
These 40 blonde jokes remind us that humor comes in many forms—from the unexpected quirks of daily life to the absurdity of everyday problems. Each joke playfully exaggerates the relatable challenges we all face, whether it’s navigating new technology, puzzling over recipes, or even deciphering the mysteries of a sinking memory. The jokes invite us to laugh at ourselves and to find joy in the unpredictability of life.
While traditional blonde jokes have sometimes relied on stereotypes, this collection aims to serve as a lighthearted diversion—a playful celebration of wit and creativity. They encourage us to embrace laughter as the universal language that transforms ordinary moments into delightful memories.
So, did these jokes brighten your day? Do they remind you of the fun in life’s little misadventures? Whether you share them with friends over lunch or post them online for a burst of virtual merriment, these jokes are here to bring a smile to your face.
Please SHARE this article with your family and friends on Facebook and spread the laughter. Enjoy these 40 blonde jokes, and may they remind you that sometimes, a little humor is all it takes to turn an ordinary day into something extraordinary!
